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 Does the pain ever go away??
 
 1/5/2009 6:33:25 PM
Galway Gal
2 posts


Does the pain ever go away??

I know it's the New Year that has set me off!!

Hubby & I did 4 rounds of treatment (1 IVF & 3 ICSI) last treatment we did was in Nov 2003 & I still have bad days. The guilt never goes away, my sister, brother in law are emigrating to Australia with their 2 children soon and as they are my parents only grandchildren it has really gotten to me recently.

I know I should be greatful for alot............. a great husband, mortgage free, a job (for the moment anyway) great friends but there are times when babies just send me into tears.

Good luck to all of you are in the middle of a cycle.............it really is a lottery.

C'est la vie

All the very Best of 2009

Galway Gal

 1/5/2009 10:32:35 PM
Folle
9 posts


Re: Does the pain ever go away??

Hi Galway Gal,

I do feel for you..(We have finished treatment but we are on the adoption journey). We are at a very uncertain stage ourselves. We don't know if the adoption journey is going to work out so we too are trying to come to terms with the end of treatment. It is both a relief and a sadness.

I think that it is very, very tough to finally finsh treatment and try and move on with your life no matter what the reason for finishing treatment. I imagine that certain events can and do often bring back the pain and hearbreak of not being able to have a baby.

The only thing that I can say to you is that you did have the courage to try so hard to have a baby.. Be kind to yourself.. and if you can make one of the nisig meetings, do. It can be very comforting and reassuring to talk to people at the same stage as yourself.

Take care of yourselves.

Folle

 1/6/2009 3:19:35 AM
Galway Gal
2 posts


Re: Does the pain ever go away??

Thanks Folle,

When we started fertility treatment I was determined to keep going, no matter how many times until we had a baby. But our bodies are amazing...after the 4 round & also listening to our doctor.

We decided enough was enough, when I look back at that time, I was a walking timebomb waiting to explode, dosed with hormones & living on a rollercoaster.........we are strong women to get through it.

We had spent alot of time thinking about adoption, we even sent in all the paperwork but after a long holiday in Africa, lots of soul searching & in the end a little bit of selfishness (being nearly 60 dealing with a teenager), we took the papers back.

I'd love to start up a chat/get together group in Galway. I got through it  at  first by crying on friends shoulders but now they think I should be over it. But as someone else said it's like a dull back ache, you just get used to it,

Happy New Year to all

 1/6/2009 9:04:24 PM
Folle
9 posts


Re: Does the pain ever go away??

Hi Galway Gal,

Keep an eye on this site.. I know that there are talks of starting a group in Limerick very soon. The meetings are so helpful and, although I'm on a different journey, I will continue to go.. to get and give support..

It is hard to stop. In our own situation our adoption application was moving on and we knew that we had to stop. We were sad and also very relieved that it was overn. I agree that we are strong women but it does take its toll.. physically and mentally.

I also agree that adoption is certainly not for everyone and it takes so much courage not to go ahead with it and to move on with your lives. We are very worried that it wont work out for us but we are going to give it a go.

I do hope that you make the meeting in Limerick (if it goes ahead) and that you can get support from it.

Take care of yourself.

Folle

 1/8/2009 9:44:37 AM
A&C
99 posts


Re: Does the pain ever go away??

Hi Galway Gal

 All I can say is xmas and  the new year can be hard for many people, what ever the reasons. You have to be kind to yourself and say that you both gave it your best shot and try not to beat yourself up too much. It is ok to still have bad days

As for your sister moving to Aus. It will be  hard, my brother and his wife were home over Xmas from Oz too. But we Skype them all the time and had a wonderful holiday last year. It is a wonderful country.Hopefully you will get to vist them.

Hope your feeling a bit better

Love and hugs

Catsx

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